if only i was paid for books and cigarettes, part I

Franny and Zooey is one of the more genius books I've had the pleasure of reading. It's like an old friend that just gets every twirling bit occuring between your ears, lecturing with just the right amount of audacity to ensure you that you aren't crazy and your thoughts are justified, but wallowing like a moron is the worst idea you've had yet. It's genius in the same way that your middle aged mother is beautiful, that is to say not obviously yet still honestly. It's old, the pages are yellowed, the binding is broken and dull, but because of that you know exactly it's value. The lingo is...

someone who loves me spent $100,000 and all i got was a useless piece of paper

Four years of body building my brain and I can't even get hired as a dog walker. Isn't a diploma suppose to take the form of a golden ticket? False advertising like whoa. On the plus side, my parents are gone for a week and so I get to pretend that I'm not 22 and living at home. Also, it's nice to have no one to judge me for sitting on the couch all day while wallowing in self pity fueled by rejection and inadequacy, being told via silence that you don't even require the skills to walk an animal. Everyone loves a useless college grad! Time to find solace at the bottom of a wine bottle on...

another week of unemployment in review

One thing summer HAS brought me is the British Beer Co. in Pembroke. Every Thursday after my weekly sign language class (the only form of scheduled events I have), Zan and I make our way to our new not-so-local favorite. Needless to say, the combination of my fiery locks and incredible split personality upon the entrance of alcohol into my bloodstream has led to a nice little reputation for myself. That reputation being the girl who yells at the two-man cover band featured every week, mainly because they continually refuse me happiness in the...

because no one will hire me,

I have started this blog. I have also graduated college, moved back in with my parents, and developed quite a taste for Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy after dinner with said parents, each of us with a glass of wine in hand. Thus, I have learned how to go from 22 to 62 in a matter of months. I have also learned to loathe unemployment, which turns out to not be all that of a difficult feat. Surprisingly, doing nothing all day with no form of commitment or responsibility is fucking awful. Who knew? Oh, how I would curse and shake my fist at my blank Word document during the days of endless research...